You can guarantee that come the time of the World Cup, there will hundreds of whinging articles in the papers and letters to Anne ‘Bleedin’ Obvious’ Robinson, moaning about how everybody’s been deprived of the latest crap to pour out of Albert Street, Coronation Square or whatever drivel those braindead idiots watch. Well, they know exactly where they can stick their boring tripe. On the subject of wastes of good Telly time, I staggered back from the Sutton reserve match on Sunday on find that most pointless of sports hogging the schedules - bleedin’ motor racing. The most stupid waste of time, that is. Lots of cars drive round and round in a circle for two hours and then finish up in the same order as they started. It's just like watching the traffic going round the Elephant and Castle roundabout all afternoon and there’s more chance of seeing a decent pile-up or a flattened pedestrian or cyclist. Perhaps the pubs ought to put benches outside and charge admission to watch or maybe Le Grand Prix de Southwark, only the cars have to negotiate pensioners trying to get across at the lights. B******s to crap on the telly, let’s have football and lots of it, except when the Hamlet are playing, can’t miss that.
Albert Catstrangler (The Voice of Reason)
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